Reading Corner

Thanks to all my friends and family for a great birthday! I had a good day at work despite the intensity of the problems. I am sitting here with a smile on my face - completely content with this birthday. Good day at work, nice dinner with a friend, great presents from family and friends. Very nice day indeed. :)

I bought this book over the weekend at Target after returning an exercise system I was pretty sure I wouldn't use. It's a young adult book. I've really enjoyed this section in the recent months - years. So as an ode to all things full of teenage angst - I thought I would make a list of my favorites.

*Looking for Alaska by John Green*

*An Abundance of Katherines by John Green*

*Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson*

*I am the Messenger by Mark Zusak*

*Twilight Series by Stephenie Meyer*

I'm currently itching to buy these three books:

*Paper Towns by John Green*

*The Book Thief by Mark Zusak*

*Jelliecoe Road by Melina Marchetta*

There's something comforting about a list of books. Good books feed my soul in immeasurable ways. Speaking of books - I'm still reading The Post Birthday World by Lionel Shriver. To be perfectly honest I'm not sure how much longer I'll be trying to read it. It has words like sobriquet and vertiginously. I have a graduate degree and I have no idea what many of the words she uses mean. I don't like to use dictionary.com to decipher books. However, on the positive side, it is really well written and the story is intriguing. So I'm going to hang in there FOR NOW. I hope this Tuesday finds you well. I for one will be doing my best to have a good day. I'm getting off the mats. Until then...Happy Reading & Crafting.

Monday Madness

Today is the big day - my big day. I turn 32 today at 9:58 AM Pacific Standard Time. For the past couple of weeks, I've had a really hard time getting excited about this day - but I feel the joy finally coming. Another year down - another year closer to being the person I want to be. And I know I've been in the weeds lately - the jungle really - but there is something better coming. There always is. Even when you have to shovel through shit to get to it (sorry Mom and Dad). And there's no guarantee that it'll get better today, tomorrow, or next month - but it will. I've decided that life is hard - but it's filled with pockets of happiness. I'm waiting for my next pocket - I need to actively seek it out really. I'm reading Zen in the Art of Writing by Ray Bradbury and he has this quote - which seems to sum up the past few weeks for me.

"Life is short, misery sure, mortality certain."

Instead of leading me deeper into the darkness surrounding my life it gave me a little hope. It's all true of course - but there is also joy and happiness, which leads me to the next beautiful quote:

"Love. Fall in love and stay in love. Write only what you love, and love what you write. The key word is love. You have to get up in the morning and write something you love, something to live for."

I'm waiting to find that thing - something to live for. I know it will come. I want to start my 32nd year out believing in loving things and finding something to live for - whether it be writing, reading, crafting, hanging out with friends, helping others, whatever. I believe I can make this a great year. I must.

So I digress a little - but in a very good way I think. For Monday Madness this week - I chose Claudine Hellmuth's Studio Line. There are 15 paints in the line - each jar is approximately $5.50. From those 15 paints - it is possible to make 36 additional colors. Ranger Ink has a pdf showing which paints to mix and the possible colors - very cool stuff. Claudine also has video demonstrations on You Tube. These little videos make me covet the line intensely. I've only seen the paints at one store in my area - and the size was a little bit of a barrier initially - not to mention my fear of collaging at this time. But I can see myself shelling out the $82.50 plus tax in the future - just not the near future. :)

On the crafting front - I was able to finish a layout over the weekend. I actually felt good about getting my butt in the chair. I didn't have the drive to finish much more - but I can feel the creative juices beginning to flow through my veins again. It's a sign that life will get better - like the blossoming trees outside. Spring has sprung and my creative energy is following suit. It's a great thing. I'm going to spend this week making my list of 32 things to do while I am 32. I'm also attending CKC with a few pretty cool gals on Friday - can you say personal day? Man do I love the sound of that. I'm sure I'll have some pics of the outrageousness that is my spending at CKC - although I must be careful because I go to visit Monica next week. I fear saying this - but all in all I think this might be a pretty good week. I'll definitely keep you posted. Until then...Happy Crafting!

Hodgepodge

Well...it's Friday and I made it. I'm so done with being sick, tired and stressed out. I've decided this is it. I'm getting off the mats. I'm going to be 32 in a few days and this just can't continue. I WANT to look forward to my birthday - which I'm currently struggling to do. I WANT to enjoy my job and feel like it's helping me not hurting me. I WANT to actually be fun to be around - which I am SO not right now. So from here on this post is going to be my attempt to do better, be better, and feel better.

First, I've spent two 1/2 days at home. This means I've spent a lot of time at home with my kitty which has given me the opportunity to get some pretty cool pictures of the diva kitty. Here are two of my favorites.




On the crafting front, I thought I would go through my thought process when choosing a challenge for the following week. First, I take a look at the challenges - pretty obvious I know. The challenges that caught my eye this week are:

Creative Therapy: What’s something you wish you could do? (Something you know how but are too afraid to try.) - I really like the idea of this prompt - can't really think of a story for a layout.

Method Playground: Use a monochromatic color scheme on your page... Period!... Any subject, any materials, any journaling, any title, any size... Just make the page a "one color wonder"!! - I have a lot of similar color families when it comes to patterned paper. I also have a few stories written in my journaling book - definitely a possibility.

OLW: Word Up #48 - READY. - I think I could use some of my posts from this week to show how ready I am right now for an upswing.

Journaling Junkie: The focus of this challenge would be an everyday event and using repetition -- recording what you were thinking about either while you were taking the pictures or how the pictures made you feel after you pulled them out to get ready to scrap them. - I think I could use my pictures of Tonks from this week.

Effer Dares: Splurges/Indulgences - I could use a bunch of things for this, books, cupcakes, scrapbook stuff. Really - the possibilities are endless.

Color Combos Galore:


After I've taken stock of the interesting challenges and the story possibilities, I start looking at possible combinations. For example, right now I'm really leaning towards One Little Word's Ready challenge. It would be great to combine that challenge with Color Combos Galore or Method Playground since there is no story component. I also really like the Effer Dares challenge because it will help me focus on things I love which is a really good thing right now. Creative Therapy's challenging is intriguing but for a different reason. The design team for this site is really diverse in their art mediums. Due to my current creative state, I thought it might be the perfect time to try a canvas and work off of their prompt. So - you can see I have a lot to think about. If it was a good week - I would possibly do all three. I'm hoping for a good day this weekend where I really want to stretch my creative legs. I know I won't make a decision until I'm in that chair - but I'm already mentally toying with words and pictures for each challenge. I have really good pictures for the Effer Dares challenge. I also have plenty of self-portraits for the OLW challenge. So - there it is - a little bit of my process. It gets me a little pumped just writing about it - weekend crafting here I come! Check back on Wednesday to see what I choose and how it goes. Until then...Happy Crafting!

All Over the Place

Believe it or not - things are really looking up after two days that really defied words. I wasn't sure I would make it Wednesday morning - but I did. The more I got into the groove of things - the more I felt a little more like me. I've got a ways to go - but at least I'm headed in the right friggin' direction!

I almost titled this post envy. However, I was concerned people would stop reading after all the bitching and moaning over the last few weeks. What do I envy? I envy all those people out there with artistic talent. I don't envy them in a crazy way - I just wish I could be a little more like them. On Wednesday morning I was really stalling going to work when I happened upon this. The artist's name is Luciane Folch. She does not live in the states - I believe she lives in western Europe. Regardless, her work is breathtaking. I wish I had an ounce of her talent. I was really blown away by her 2008 year in review post found here. Where in the heck does she get this stuff? She's part of the design team at SIStv. You can find her profile here. There is a line under the photo boxes on the lower left corner that says "see my whole portfolio." If you're intrigued by her work, definitely take a look. She is amazing. I wish so much my style was more like hers.

I hope this puts me in the mood to get my butt in the chair this weekend. I have no intentions to do any shopping this weekend due to CKC on April 3. I might get the binderie from 7 gypsies with my Archivers coupon - but I'm on the fence about that purchase. Besides moping around, I've been spending some time reading the new Digital Studio by Somerset.

Most of the articles and techniques are way over my head, but, I'm hoping to learn more about the digital world. I really want to stretch myself into the technical world. I think it could be a lovely experience. I'm going to try and get to work on my 32 things to do while I'm 32. I've never done anything like it before - I think it will be a good thing to try. Sorry that I'm all over the place today. It feels good to come home with some feeling of contentment. I like it a lot. Here's hoping today will go well for me and you. Until then...Happy Crafting.

BTW: I'm way way off on Lucy Folch. She is Brazilian.

Humpday Challenge

After the "joyful" posts over the last two days, I bet you were wondering if I even did a challenge over the weekend. Thankfully I dug deep and finished something. I have two layouts waiting - paper cut, pictures picked out, and nothing else. Great, I know. I did the challenge on the Design Experiment blog. It's a new find thanks to Brenda Hurd from Method Playground. I started this page wanting to paint a background. I didn't like it too much when I was finished - it got thrown away. I had already stamped the background paper - I decided to use the Marrakech line from Basic Grey and it kind of went wonky from there. It's not a matchy, matchy layout. I don't love it - but at least I got my butt in the chair and did something. I love the quote. I saw it on Ali Edward's blog a few weeks ago and then realized something today. I made a collage with the quote while in graduate school over four years ago. Gotta love that. Gotta love it when your past meets your present in small ways. If you would have asked me, I would have told you I didn't like this quote until recently. I would have been very wrong. These words resonate with me still. I'm not sure if it's easy to read - so I will post it here.

Happiness is a journey, not a destination. For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one.
-Souza

I hope someday I will except that life is a journey not a destination. I hope I begin to remember that in my creative life. Even though I'm not in love with this layout, it's part of the journey to the next thing I'm crazy about. Even though I'm in a creative slump, it's part of the journey to inspiration. It's a hard lesson - I might spend my entire life trying to learn it - but it gives this sad girl a little hope. Until then...Happy Crafting!

BTW: I'm trying really hard not to cry right now. I need to get off the mat - I'm so not sure how. I hope this ends soon.

Reading Corner

For quite some time I have been intrigued by painting, drawing and collaging. This is after years of telling myself I am talentless when it comes to visual arts. Actually, I think I've told myself I'm pretty much talentless in all arts. And in truth, I've always wanted to be more artistic. Unfortunately, I've been replaying my message of no talent since grade school. I remember being envious of others talents as far back as second grade. Not sure how to mount an offensive against self talk that has been in existence since the age of 7.

The cool thing is I am mounting an offensive. I've bought the paint brushes, paint, canvases, graphite pencils and books (of course). In honor of my attempt to stay true to the voice inside my head saying collage, paint, draw - give it a try, I'm devoting this reading corner to a few books on collage. I hope they are inspiring to someone in the same way they've been inspiring to me.

I've read the first two books, Talking Flight: Inspiration and Techniques to Give Your Creative Spirit Wings by Kelly Rae Roberts and Collage Unleashed by Traci Bautista. I'm currently reading Collage Journeys by Jane Davies. I've enjoyed what I've read so far. I apologize for the size of the pictures - still trying to figure this thing out. I hope this Tuesday finds you well. Until then...Happy Reading & Crafting!

BTW: Ok - now I'm pissed. As many of you know - I've been going through quite a slump right now. I feel like someone took a wrecking ball to my creative brain. And then - I go on Kelly Rae Roberts blog to post a link and see this. WTF: Her sister-in-law JUST started painting and it's amazing! I'm ashamed of my stuff. I am clearly doing something wrong - and ranting and raving won't help. I just needed to do it (rant). I know I need to be happy for her and I will try to search deep into the recesses of my soul to find something. I might be searching for a while. :)

Monday Madness

Another week of Monday Madness - and I'm starting to feel a little mad. BTW: When I say mad, I mean crazy not angry. I'm so tired and frustrated with being creatively dead right now it brings me to tears. I had the hardest time finding something for Monday Madness despite my prior planning. I have pictures ready for this weekly and I just feel nothing. Well, not nothing - I do feel a little happy about this set - how could you not? Birds, Clouds, Sun - the best of nature in my opinion. The only thing missing are trees. I hate being a killjoy on such a wonderful day like Monday Madness - but being burnt out is a real bitch. Please pardon my language. I've really come to depend on this crafty thing. I find my mind is wired differently now. I'm constantly coming up with stories for events. I look forward to crafting on the weekends - but I can't find the creative energy right now. I think the hardest thing about this current downswing is there is no Plan B. My Plan B is not interesting me either. I'm trying to remember that writing this blog is an act of creativity. Also, testing out textures on my photos is an act of creativity.

I find that I'm very concrete when it comes to certain areas of my life. For example, I always wanted to help people so I became a social worker. I took a very literal view of helping people. I wish I would have thought out of the box a little more. Books and crafts help me so much. There are so many ways to help people. I wish I would have seen that earlier. And even though I know that now - I'm happy with my choice to be a social worker. However, if I ever need a change - I know to think out of the box. I wish I could learn this lesson in my creative life - find the breakthrough. I wish I could be a little less concrete when it comes to this creative thing. I think there are too many things kicking me in the junk right now. I'm really looking forward to CKC in a little less than two weeks and then a craft weekend. At least there's that...At least there's something. I really hope my mojo comes back soon. I absolutely hate being burnt out. I hope this Monday finds you well and full of creative energy - everyone deserves that. Until then...Happy Crafting!

I Can't Believe

Sad girl. I'm a sad girl right now. I need to reboot - I need to be near my family - I need to reconnect with the things I love - I need something - something I don't even know. I can't believe I feel like this right now. I can't believe I ever wanted to grow up so fast. I can't believe tomorrow starts ANOTHER friggin' work week. I just can't believe it. I want you to brace yourself - because I'm in a serious creative funk. If you're one of those people that needs positive thoughts and creative energy, you might want to play this week by ear in terms of visiting the blog - cuz I have very little positive flowing through me at this moment. Still, I'd love to have you here. Just thought you needed a heads up. I don't think happy is in the cards this week. I'm definitely not at one with the universe. Here's hoping I will be. Have a wonderful week. Until then...Happy Crafting!